Post by ..:Jake Xavier:.. on Mar 29, 2007 22:57:48 GMT -5
|x| They say every cloud has a silver lining .. |x|
The bright light from the full moon shone down on Jake Xavier as he sat there, in a dark alley, head facing the ground. He sat, curled up in a ball, thinking. Reflecting on his past. He thought deeply about his upcoming match. Reflecting and thinking, yes.
He began to shake, moving back and forth in the cold wind. Every couple of moments, Jake would go faster for a brief moment, and end the quick movement, where he began to laugh hysterically in the night. What was he laughing at? Even to him that was a mystery.
Minutes went by, still nothing stopping the insane cycle of Jake Xavier. Hours went by, and Jake continued to do the same movements, over and over. Rain began to fall from the clouds in the sky, hitting hard, splashing on the dark brown hair of Jake. Yet nothing stopped him.
It was almost 5 hours in, Jake was still sitting in the dark alley alone. Well, alone, possibly, but to Jake, he knew that they were there. The people of his childhood, the people of his dark past. The people that he never wanted to talk about, because he never had the courage to do so.
One more hour passed, and then Jake stopped. He stopped breathing, he stopped thinking, he stopped his heart rate. He moved for the first time in so long. He dropped his hands to his side, and looked straight up into the sky. He stretched his hands out, and began to study the clouds. He began to remember a old message from his past.
It was in a small child book, the first book he ever read. The title, “Follow your Dreams, Follow the Clouds.” He remembered reading the first two sentences in the book, the first two sentences he could ever read. “Every cloud has sliver lining. Ever dream can be completed.”
Bullshit Jake thought to himself, covering his hands over his eyes for a brief second What a bunch of bullshit. Lies, that's all they told us, that is the only thing they have ever told us. When I was young, that's all that happened to me, people telling me lies.
Voices began to flow through the disturbed mind of Jake Xavier.
”I promise you son, I'll never hit you again.
”Jake's a homo! Jake's a homo!”
”Come on, smoke this. It can't hurt you man, it's just some mary jane man..”
The voices continued in the mind of Xavier, that's until he snapped. He jumped to his feet, and began to rattle the chain fence nearby, screaming wildly into the night. No one heard him however, as his voice became lost in the screeching winds.
No, stop it. Stop it! Jake Xavier thought to himself. Stop!
He screamed again, this time louder then ever. He began to breath hard, and started to walk back and forth, stamping his feet in to the ground, shaking. He tried to calm down, but his attempt failed.
AM I GOING INSANE?!?!?!? Jake said to himself. What the fuck is wrong with me?
Then, he snapped at himself again. He dropped himself to the ground. He crawled, dragging his body off the wet, damp gravel and hiding himself in the corner of the pitch black alley. He sat in the corner, sitting up in a ball again, beginning to shake. That's when the cycle of his insanity started again. But this time, it stopped earlier then expected. It stopped when the voices started coming back to him. Except this time, it wasn't just voices, it was memories.
Hey Jake, I want to say this to you Jake, but it's over. I'm sorry, we're not ment to be.
Jake remembered that harsh memory, the day his “true love” stabbed him in the back. He got so angry, he didn't leave his house for weeks. She didn't even have the guts to tell him, she knew what Jake was capable of. It seems some people in XVI don't.
Why are you doing this to me? He stopped himself. He noticed what he was doing. He was blaming it on God, the only one that could really take the blame. Why am I doing this to myself?!?!
Jake was getting more then one psychopathic flashback. The next minute, he found himself lying in a small house. It was cold, the floor of burnt carpet and stains of alcohol. The sound of the harsh wind was replaced by the sounds of moans and screams. He stood, making a squishing noise as his black combat boots hit the crummy carpet. He walked toward the sound of the screams and moans, like it was hypnotizing Jake. He walked in, and there was a child. He sat lying on the ground, terrified. A big man leaned over the young boy, the smell of booze off his breath, as he raises his hand and smacked the child, laughing. The man laughed and laughed, continuing to hit the child as tears rushed down his face.
Soon, Jake dropped to the floor, he could not take this any longer. *He wanted to stop the man, but he knew that he could not hurt his, he could not hurt his...he couldn't hurt his..own blood..
Soon, Jake began to twirl, getting dizzy he found himself lying on the gravel floor of the alley again. He was safe, yet was there really safe living a life like this?
..:Jake Xavier:..
Forgive me father, for I have Sinned, God Help Me, I need to be saved.
But could he be saved? He wondered as he wandered out of the darkness. The Darkness, The Darkness, The Darkness.
|x| .. but who would look for something that small? |x|
