Side Effect Results: June 13th, 2007

[Makaveli The Don]

Red and Gray pyros blast off around the ring. After going around the ring, the pyros follow up the entrance ramp and once at the top a huge explosion comes out from the pyros as they go up high up in the air.

Ed Set:
Ladies and Gentleman we are kicking this HUGE Side Effect off with the first of 4 King Of The Ring tournament, first round matches.

David Sierra:
And the first of the 4 matches is Prozac vs. The Kobra, in a No DQ match.

Eric Cabrera stands in the centre of the ring as The Kobra jumps out from behind the curtain. He begins to make his way down the ramp but is suddenly taken off his feet by Prozac who is swinging a steel chair around. Kobra writhes on the floor as Prozac delivers more shots to the back of The Kobra.

Ed Set:
Oh my god, Prozac didn’t even allow Eric to introduce the two men, and now he is relentlessly beating Kobra with that chair. I mean look at the dent in it.

Prozac holds the chair above his head like a trophy, Kobra tries to crawl away but Prozac won't let that happen. He picks up Kobra by his hair and tosses him inside the ring. The chair soon follows along with Prozac, an evil stare from Prozac to the fans ignites the audience and they erupt with boo's and jeer's. Prozac positions the chairs and lifts Kobra into an Argentine Backbreaker position, He then throws Kobra's legs over his body and plants him with the P-Bomb, another sick grin and Prozac grabs the chair and places it around the neck of Kobra, Prozac slowly makes his way up the turnbuckle and squats down on there.

David Sierra:
This doesn't look good for Kobra at all

Ed Set:
Prozac with evil intent in his eyes right now

Prozac leaps from the top rope hitting a flying forearm drop across the chair and crushing it around Kobra's neck. The whole arena stand sin shock as Prozac moves into the cover...
1...
2...
3!

Prozac slowly stands up and the referee goes to raise the hand of Prozac but he pulls away and simply stares at Kobra lying lifelessly on the floor.

Ed Set:
Sick! that is all that can describe what we have just seen.

David Sierra:
No Ed, Brilliant, how else to make a point to the other contestants than like that!

Prozac rolls out of the ring and walks up the ramp not giving a second glance back to Kobra who still hasn’t moved, Prozac disappears behind the curtain as the scene fades to black.

[Makaveli The Don]

And we're back from a commercial to a shot of the action packed XVI arena. The crowd is going insane, nothing seems to be stopping the complete and utter explosion of cheers for any and every person who had brought Side Effect to them.

David ~ Welcome back everyone, this is David Sierra here at ringside with Ed Set at XVI Side Effect!

Ed ~ Man, that last match was a total squash match.

David laughs.

Ed ~ What are you laughing at?

David ~ You made it sound like it was a match between squashes.

Both men laugh as the camera lands on them.

David ~ If you're just tuning in, we're talking about the match between Prozac and 'The' Kobra.

Ed ~ More like the Squasher and the Squashee.

Both men laugh again, but as they do .. footsteps can be heard over the PA system. The entire arena hushes. A pin could have been heard if dropped.

Then .. the footsteps stop. Silence envelopes the masses in attendance, as well as the announcers. The stage hands that would normally be rushing around are stood, staring up at the blank XVItron, awaiting the unschedueled visit by whomever was about to enter.

Suddenly, a deep voice that would strike fear into the hearts of the bravest of men rings over the PA's and out over the ocean of people ..

Voice ~ Are you ready?

The crowd recognizes the voice and an explosion of jubilation resounds across the complete building. It reaches the outmost part of the parking lot, and continues out into the busy night.

Once again, the voice rings in their ears.

Voice ~ It has begun.

Suddenly, the lights dim, as a pane of glass shatters, sounding throughout the arena. The drum solo from"Metalingus" rocks the arena, then stops .. and an explosion goes off. White pyro's shoot into the air as the crowd jump to their feet, screaming salutations to their icon. A single white spotlight shines down on the man standing there, who is covered in mist and fog. He takes two steps forward, stepping out of the mist. He is fully decked out in black. His black leather trench coat hangs down around his leather boots. His black jeans have a chain hanging from one of the belt loops and he is wearing a black muscle shirt. His new blonde, wavy locks draped down around his shoulders and face, accentuating his grey-black eyes. He slowly begins to make his way to the ring, looking around at the crowd. He slides under the bottom rope and jumps up onto his feet. He walks to the back corner of the ring, reaching down to an XVI official and getting a microphone. He stands up in the ring and awaits the silence of the crowd.

David ~ It seems Mister Ultimate Assault wants to say something.

Ed rolls his eyes.

Ed ~ Thank you, Captian Obvious.

David turns to Ed.

David ~ Shut up.

Jordan continues to pace the ring, awaiting the crowd to stop praising the perfection they saw before them. He smiles as they begin to quiet down, now wanting to hear what this man wanted to say. He then stopped in one spot, staring up the ramp toward the curtain.

He slowly, oh so slowly, raises the microphone to his mouth, then parts his lips. Oh the volumes that one word in his voice spoke.

Jordan ~ Tonight, we are seeing the qualifying matches for King Of The Ring, correct?

The crowd cheers, affirming what Jordan just said.

Jordan ~ Right. But really .. who really gives a flying fuck about King Of The Ring? The real action is going to happen at The American Dream, when I, Jordan 'Bullet Proof' Glass, Mister Ultimate Assault, go against whoever the hell is going to be the Xtreme Vicious Intent World Champion at that point.

The crowd once again go insane at Jordan's words. He smirks, chuckling.

Jordan ~ See .. not many people know who holds the title as of now. They arn't the champion, but they do have the authority to defend it whenever they so please. That person is, the owner of this federation, 'The Don' Makaveli.

The enitre crowd then fills the atmosphere with a flood of boo's. Jordan laughs as he begins to pace around the ring once more.

Jordan ~ Everyone thinks that because our boss that we won't speak our mind about him, but I for one have the guts to stand up to that twisted blood of a bitch.

All sound in the arena halts. Everyone is shocked by what Jordan Glass just called HIS BOSS.

David ~ My God, Jordan. I'm hoping you realize the reprocussons of what you're doing.

Ed ~ Of course he does. He's a smart man Dave, don't underestimate him.

Jordan smriks as he stops, fixing his gaze on the curtain.

Jordan ~ You smart little bastard, you know how to run this company. You have your nose in every nook and cranny here, and that's why I don't associate with anyone unless I know I can trust them to stay the fuck away from you.

You're a smart one, Don, but I'm smarter. I'm not waiting until YOU decide to TELL me you're going to face me at The American Dream, oh no.

The crowd begin to talk amongst themselves, confused about what Jordan is saying.

Ed ~ What the hell is he talking about?

David ~ Apparently he knows more than we do.

Jordan continues to speak up the ramp toward the curtain.

Jordan ~ You see, I have my connections too. I know what you're planning before you do. SO .. instead of waiting on you, I'm going to beat you to the punch.

The crowd begin to catch on, and they start to chant Jordan's name.

- Jor-dan, Jor-dan, Jor-dan! -

Jordan ~ Not only do I challenge YOU, Makaveli, for the title at The American Dream, I am challenging to to a non-title match at King Of The Ring, just so I can show you that I will be the champion.

The crowd erupt with cheers once again at the annoucnement of the boss in a match with Jordan 'Bullet Proof' Glass.

Jordan ~ And don't even think of coming out here, Big 'Don' Man. I have plans so I'm getting out of here. Just have your secretary let me know WHEN you accept. Got that? Good.

Jordan goes to drop the mic, but then stops. He raises the microphone back to his smirking lips.

Jordan ~ Oh yeah, I almost forgot.

Needles prick, knives cut but at King of The Ring Makaveli, glass WILL scar you. You can bank on that.

Jordan drops the microphone and drops down, sliding out of the ring as his 'Metalingus' roars over the PA's. The scene fades with Jordan making his way up the ramp, his flowing blonde locks flapping behind him.

Suddenly, you're screen cuts to white noise. Static is all that can be heard and snow fills your screen. Then .. his voice can be heard once more.

Voice ~ We're taking over. Watch you're back, bitch.

[Makaveli The Don]

Final Countdown begins to quietly thrum into the stadium. The crowd grows silent to hear the music, once realizing the man behind the music, A majority jump top there feet. The arena begins to resinate with there cheers. There is an explosion at the top of the entrance ramp. Bryan apears from behind the pyro (Almost like Rey Mysterio) As the music picks up, Bryan runs to the apron, and jumps onto the ring side. He grabs the ropes and uses them as leverage to flip into the ring. He taunts to the crowd as he jumps up and down in the ring jabing all around.

The arena lights dim and a blast of gold pyros go off all along the edges of the ramp. "Smack That" by Akon hits and the crowd gives a mixed reaction. Rachel comes out from behind the curtain and stands atop the stage. She holds her head high, her nose in the air, as if to say, "The best has finally arrived." She stands at the top of the ramp for a moment, surveying the crowd, before heading down with an arrogant stride. Rachel slips in between the ropes and circles the ring never taking her eyes off of Variety

DING DING DING

The match starts off as Rachel is a little reluctant to get into the center of the ring where Bryan Variety stands taunting her on. Rachel blinks a couple times as she finally starts to make her way towards Bryan Variety.

Ed: Rachel seems to be hesitant but after last week, let's see how long that lasts.

David: Hopefully that wont happen again

Rachel and Variety now lock up for a little bit before Variety shoves her off onto her ass. Rachel gets up and stares through him. Variety walks towards her as she steps back, Bryan laughs but is kicked in the stomach and slammed on his head by his hair.

David: If anything this match is not fair for Variety.

Ed: I don't think I can argue, this woman is crazy I do not think any man could marry her.

Rachel climbs the top rope as Bryan climbs to his feet

Ed: What is going to happen here?

David: Flight R A C H E L is about to take off

Rachel launches into the air with a cross body to Variety and holds on for the pin.. 1...2..

David: Rachel seems to be trying to end this fast

Ed: I think Rachel needs to pay more attention

Rachel has her back turned as she has started to untie the turnbuckle cushion, Bryan who has made it back to his feet runs up behind her and gives her a forearm smash to the back of the head. Rachel slumps over and is dumped out of the ring by Variety

Ed: Outside of the ring is never a good place to be

The ref starts the count... 1, ...2, ...3

David: Especially after getting a side slam like Rachel just received.

Ed: It never matters, and this is not taking anything away from Rachel. But any man that faces a woman of her weight can be a powerhouse.

Variety stomps on Rachel as the ref counts 7. Variety picks her up and rolls her back into the ring. Bryan slides in and calls for the match to end. The arena starts cheering and hollering as they are awaiting the shooting star press. Variety claps his hands then points to the ceiling as he climbs the rope.

Ed: Game over!! Right Here!!

Variety flips off of the tope turnbuckle and face plants into the mat as Rachel managed to roll out of the way just in time.

David: She used a continue, nothing is over this woman is going to fight as she always does.

Both competitors make it to their feet as Rachel has a bit of a vicious look on her face. She is smiling and glaring all at the same time as Variety laughs at the intimidation attempt.

David: Oh no Ed it is that same look from last week.

Bryan charges her and whips her into the ropes. Rachel bounces back and is met with a firemans carry. "DVD, DVD"

David: Well look or no look, a death valley driver is going to stop any momentum. Rachel manages to throat chop Variety and deliver a thunderous bulldog. Rachel jumps back up and the crowd goes ballistic as the woman is clearly turned psychotic.

Ed: David I am afraid you were right this is last week all over.

Rachel pulls the cushion off of the turnbuckle as the referee is arguing with her, she simply shrugs him off as she approaches Variety. The two exchange punches but it all stops when Rachel goes downstairs on Variety. She whips him into the corner with the metal ripping into his back.

David: WE HAVE BLOOD!!

Ed: This woman needs to be stopped.

Variety comes out of the corner hold his back feeling the warm blood down it as Rachel scoops him up on her shoulders and executes a perfect 727.

Ed: 727! 727! Variety is down

David: OUCHTOWN POPULATION YOU BRO!!

Rachel looks around as she licks her lips and begins to climb the turnbuckle

David: What is she not done? What is wrong with this woman?

Ed: It think.. yes it is!

Rachel flies through the air with a Vixen Flip landing right on top of Variety, she hooks the leg to make the pin...1, ...2, ...3

David: She did it, Rachel won the match!

Ed: I think more has happend here tonight than Rachel winning, I believe she just went insane.

DING DING DING

Ring Announcer: WINNER OF THIS MATCH AND CONTINUING ON TO THE SEMI-FINALS... RACHEL MARTIN!!!!!

[Makaveli The Don]

David Sierra: This match is a round one match up in the King of the Ring tournament, it is a tables match. Introducing first from Stoke-On-Trent UK, and weighing in at 215 pounds…Ticker!

David Sierra: And his opponent from Stoke-on-Trent, UK, weighing in at 220 pounds, he is the XVI Xtream champion…Calaz!

Ticker and Calaz both circle each other, there arms spread ready for anything. They both leap at each other and lock up, soon after Calaz takes Ticker down with a headlock takedown, Ticker springs to his feet breaking the headlock, Calaz jumps back up and again hits another headlock takedown which Ticker springs up from again. Calaz jumps to his feet once again, but this time when he jumps at Ticker, Tickers hits a hard dropkick to his face which sends Calaz to his back. Calaz then rolls out of the ring.

David: Calaz taking a breather, he should maybe rethink his game plan too.

Ed: Don’t worry about Calaz, he has been doing big things for himself lately and he will not let someone like Ticker stand in his way.

Calaz begins mouthing off to a fan with his back turned to Ticker who is still in the ring, this is not a good idea as Ticker bounces off the ropes on the opposite side of the ring, then launches himself over the top rope crossbodying Calaz from behind. The crowd is cheering widely as Ticker gets up a little dazed himself from the move. He soon shakes to cub webs loose and slides back in the ring.

Ed: It’s ok the Xtream champ doesn’t have to rush to get to his feet; Makaveli has made this match a tables match.

David; I still think he let him off easy.

Calaz gets to his feet kind of slowly looking a little in pain and a little shocked. He turns to see Ticker standing near the ropes where Ticker slingshots himself over at Calaz, but Calaz moves out of the way, but Ticker is able to land on his feet stopping a very painful crash landing. Calaz is smiling unaware that Ticker landed on his feet. He turns right into a hard left punch from Ticker that sends him stumbling backwards a step, Ticker remains on the assault and nails Calaz with a flurry of left and rights.

David: Ticker brining it to Calaz, this match would be a huge win for him, not only is it a win over the Xtream champ but it’s a round one win in the King of the Ring.

Ticker ends his flurry with a left kick to Calaz’s gut. Ticker then grabs Calaz by the head and goes to slam his head into the barricade, but Calaz puts his hands up and blocks it. Calaz then elbows Ticker in the mid section then whips him into the steel stairs where Ticker hits legs first which flips him over them.

David: Calaz now takes control.

Calaz slowly walks over to Ticker grinning the whole way. Ticker gets to his knees when Calaz grabs him by the hair and lifts him the rest of the way, hew then hard whips him into the stairs again, Ticker hitting back first this time.

David: A sickening sound made from Tickers body hitting the stairs.

Calaz reaches under the ring and pulls out a trash can lid. He turns and heads over to Ticker who is just getting to his feet using the stirs as surport. Ticker turns and gets blasted in the head with the can lid.

David: Oh come on, this is a tables match not a hardcore match.

Ed: There are no rules though and Calaz is taking this match to the Xtream.

Ticker is on his knees and Calaz raises the lid above his head once again, but Ticker punches Calaz in the gut forcing him to drop the trash can lid. On Tickers way up to his feet he grabs the lid, once up he smacks Calaz in the side of the face with it. Calaz stumbles to the side, stops him self then turns to be hit on the other cheek, which sends his limp body crashing to the ground.

David: The champ is down, Mak must be loving this.

Ticker drops the lid and goes to the ring and looks under it. He pulls out a table and the crowd begins to cheer. Ticker sets it up near the corner of the ring and heads back over to Calaz. He lifts Calaz and drags him by the head over to the table and places him on it. Ticker then rolls in the ring and climbs the turnbuckle. The crowd is yelling but Calaz rolls off the tables. Ticker see this and jumps down onto the apron., When Calaz turns around Ticker launches himself off the apron and look to be going for a double axe handle but Calaz punches him in the stomach mid air.

Ed: Calaz with eyes in the back of his head.

Calaz kicks Ticker in the gut and hits a snap suplex. He then stands and goes under the ring and pulls out another table then slides it in the ring. He lifts Ticker to his feet and rolls him in the ring and slides in after him. Once in the ring, Calaz lifts Ticker and scoop slams him on the laid out table.

David: The table comes into play now as a weapon.

Ed: Yes, Calaz is just doing as much damage as he can to his opponent so the next time he slams his opponent on it, it will be open and he will be the winner.

Calaz lifts Ticker up and Calaz runs at Ticker, and slams his knee into his stomach. He then backs Ticker into the corner, and begins hitting right and left hands on him. Calaz then forces Ticker's head against the turnbuckle with his forearm. Ticker pushes Calaz backwards away from him and goes for a kick, but Calaz catches his foot. Ticker thought jumps up and kicks Calaz in the side of the head with his free foot. Calaz is stumbling around then is hit with a bulldog. Ticker then sets up the table and goes back to get Calaz. He places Calaz on the table and climbs the turnbuckle, but again Calaz doesn’t stay on the table and jumps up on the turnbuckle with Ticker and the two men begin to brawl.

Ed: Watch out Calaz the table is behind you don’t fall.

Ticker gets the upper hand and looks likes he’s about to knock Calaz off the turnbuckle and threw the table when Calaz pokes him in the eye. While Ticker is blinded Calaz pushes him off the turnbuckle and Ticker falls threw the table that was set up out side the ring.

David: He did it, Calaz had to use a cheap move to do it, but he did it.

[Makaveli The Don]

The scene opens backstage, Ticker sits on the medical bed with an ice pack on his neck recovering from the table he just went through. The doctor is talking to him whilst examining him and Ticker is nodding and wincing in pain. Ticker and the doctor both look up as someone enters the room.

~ Doctor ~
Hey, why don't you wait outside i'll take a look at you after but right now I gotta see to Ticker

Calaz steps into the view of the camera. Ticker stands up with a look of pain on his face and the two men go nose to nose. They hold still for a few seconds until Calaz finally extends his hand out to Ticker. Ticker looks bewildered for a second; he hesitates, then extends his own hand and shakes Calaz's hand as Calaz nods on.

~ “The New Era Icon” David Calaz ~
You did good kid, you did real good. Do me a favour... Kick Jake Xavier's ass at the PPV and win that title, I want to be able to say I was almost beat by a champion at least

Calaz goes to release the grip with Ticker but Ticker grabs on tight, he looks Calaz dead in the eyes for a second breathing heavily.

~ Ticker ~
And you better win the King Of The Ring tournament and keep that title, at least then I can say I was beaten by a champion and a king, and I won't have to hang my head at that...

Calaz laughs and looks up at Ticker.

~ “The New Era Icon” David Calaz ~
You remind me of myself... I like you kid, you're gonna go far, do this business proud, no matter what happens to me OK?

Ticker nods his head then Calaz nods once again and taps Ticker on the shoulder, he releases his grip and walks off camera leaving Ticker standing with the ice pack still on his neck and his other arm still outstretched. Ticker then snaps out of it and sits back down on the bed allowing the doctor to examine him again while the scene fades to black.

[Makaveli The Don]

The scene opens again on the screaming XVI fans. Eric Cabrera stands in the ring awaiting the next match. Pitch black darkness descends upon the area. Entrance music starts to play as walls of fire line the ramp a hooded figure in black on a black throne with a chained black mastiff sitting on each side of it as a fog starts to cover the arena. The man on throne lets his hood fall back revealing white horns as he sips a mug of blood. The mug comes down and the man smiles revealing a pair of fangs. He stands up then sets the mug on the seat of the throne as a pair of black feathery wings spread. He slowly walks down the ramp as a light rain starts to fall a lightning bolt hitting the centre of the ring every few seconds until his feet hit the steps. He slowly steps into the ring in between the second and top ropes. He walks to the centre of the ring and then lifts his arms and then drops them as the lights come back up. Unbuttons his black cloak as the wings fold back down and then takes it off the revealing his black clothes and his midnight black hair flowing down his back as he grins. On his waist is strapped a sword that is drawn to reveal a bluish tinted blade. He raises the blade as balls of ice fall on the ring posts. He sheathes the sword and then un-straps his sword belt. Walks to his corner the winged cloak and sword belt handed to bell ringer.

Eric Cabrera:
Ladies and Gentlemen, this next match is scheduled for one fall and is a King Of The Ring first round qualifying match, it will be contested under hardcore rues. Introducing first hailing from an unknown location... "The Immortal" Sah'ta Thor!

Ed Set:
Well here we go folks our final match of the evening and what a way to end it after the show we have had tonight.

David Sierra:
As always an excellent night of entertainment, but what else would you expect, we are XVI...

Stars and Stripes Forever plays over the PA system as a marching band comes from behind the curtains with full attire and enthusiasm. From behind them comes Corporeal Punishment with a huge spanning American Flag over his shoulder as he waves it about and salutes creating a short explosion with red white and blue streamers going everywhere. He looks focused as usual with a broad chin and murderously patriotic look on his face. He makes his way to the ring as the Marching band travels around it and comes out from the left and travels back up the ramp as we get one more salute from the Corporeal.

Eric Cabrera:
And, his opponent, from Greenbough Alabama... He is Corporal Punishment!

Ed Set:
Corp is a true fan favourite here in XVI, its good to see a good guy every now and then.

Corp and Thor circle the ring, both looking to make a move on one another. Corp goes in for the tie up but Thor drops to one knee and takes the big man down. Thor follows up by kicking Corp in the back of his leg, and then delivers another. Corp lifts his other leg up and kicks Thor away and both men jump to their feet and stand off.

David Sierra:
An unexpected start to this match aye Ed?

Ed Set:
Both men showing that they can actually wrestle as well as brawl

They lock up once more and Corp takes the arm of Thor. Moves into a hammerlock and follows up by delivering a snap mare to Thor and then straight into a sleeper hold. Thor becomes weak, Corp has his arm straight across the throat of Thor, and the circulation begins to cut off as Thor's eye's roll back into his head... Suddenly a new lease of life for Thor, he begins to get his second wind and starts to battle back delivering an elbow to the gut of Corp, then another, and finally a third, Corp releases the sleeper and Thor manages to whip him against the ropes, Thor tries to knock Corp down with a shoulder block but Corp doesn’t go down and begins to hammer blows down on Thor.

Ed Set:
Your not going to knock the Corp down that easy no matter how big you are, Punishments a tough guy.

Corp backs Thor into a corner and Corp measures Thor for a big hit, Corp raises his arms but Thor drops down and rolls out of the ring, he walks toward the ring post and Corp jumps down to the outside also, Thor is taking a breather on the post when Corp comes from behind, Thor scouts it and grabs his arm forcing him face first into the ring post.

David Sierra:
Great move by Thor well scouted

Corp lies on the floor in pain as Thor grabs a steel Chair and begins to smash it down on Corporal Punishment leg. Numerous shots later and Corp writhes in pain on the floor as Thor holds the chair high above his head. Thor Picks Corp up and rolls him into the ring, he wraps one of Corp's legs around the post and smashes it with the chair. Corp rolls to the centre of the ring in absolute agony as Thor evilly grins and climbs into the ring.

Ed Set:
Oh... My... God, I don't think I have ever seen anything as sick as that. Corporal Punishment's leg could be snapped in half right there, this is getting difficult to watch

Thor picks up Corp's already destroyed leg and manipulates it and himself into the Indian Deathlock submission hold, almost instantaneously Corp taps out screaming in pain.

Ed Set:
And Thor has done it!

David Sierra:
Ah! He tapped out! Thor advances to Round 2!

Ed Set:
One hell of a Side Effect. Folks, tune in next week to find out who the two Finalists are!!