Post by The VNB on Mar 13, 2007 11:19:31 GMT -5
The XVItron comes to life and we see the outside shot of the Children's Memorial Hospital in Chicago. The camera then cuts to inside of the hospital where we see Fade Gordy, Dressed in a black suit, Still with his dirty brown trench coat on... Visiting room to room of sick children. Head of VNB Public Relations, Jefferson Davis, Is seen walking with him, As well as the head of XVI's Public Relations Department Arnold Grant (A man who is in his 50's with balding head of gray hair and pretty big gut), A beautiful young woman named Amy Carter from the Dreams Come True Foundation, And Sarah Reed, An older woman who definitely falls under the MILF category, She is one of the head nurses of the hospital. Daisy Marie is nowhere to be seen. As Fade stops in front of the next room he is supposed to enter he turns to look at Jefferson and whispers.
Fade ~ Why the hell are we here again?
Jefferson ~ Because The XVI has made a public relations deal with the Dreams Come True Foundation and you're here to visit all these sick little disease bags. Trying to fill their heads that they are not going to die but rather they can have their last wish on earth.
Nurse Reed steps next to the door of the next room and opens it.
Sarah Reed ~ And in here is Timmy Williams. He is one of the biggest XVI fans in the hospital. It would sure brighten his day to meet you.
Fade forces a fake smile as he turns and then heads into the room.
Fade ~ Hey Timmy how are you do.... OH MY GOD!!! What the hell happened to his face!!
The camera pans to Timmy and we can see that his entire face has wicked burn scars all over it. Timmy is taken back for a second by Fade's reaction, And tears can be seen forming in his eyes, Nurse Reed quickly heads over to the boy to calm him down. Amy Carter steps in close to Fade and whispers to him.
Amy ~ Timmy fell into a fire at a family reunion where they were roasting marshmallows. As you can see he was burned very, Very, Badly.
Fade ~ It looks like someone ate his face!
Jefferson ~ Mike's right, That is one ugly kid!
Amy ~ What?!! Show a little compassion! It's not like Timmy wanted to fall into that fire. He is very sensitive about how he looks now.
Fade ~ No shit. Sure the saying is true about how chicks dig scars and all that, But not when you don't have a friggin' face. Look at him! He looks worse than Rosie O'Donnel stuffing her fat face with jelly filled donut.
Timmy starts to cry as Nurse Reed hugs him and tries to make him feel better. Amy Carter, and Arnold Grant, Then push Fade and Jefferson into the hall. Amy then glares at Fade.
Amy ~ What is wrong with you?!! How dare you insult a little boy like that?!! Is this the way every superstar in XVI acts when visiting sick children?!!
Arnold Grant ~ No, Ma'am, Not every superstar acts this way. Fade understands that sick children are very sensitive about themselves. Fade just has a problem of thinking before he speaks sometimes. Isn't that right, Fade?
Fade ~ Huh? I wasn't paying attention. Listen, Amy, Honey, Sweet cheeks. How about we forget about these kids for a few minutes and we can head over to that broom closet over there. You look like you need a ride on The Fade Express.
Amy ~ Excuse me?!! What did you just say?!!
Jefferson ~ Uh! What Fade here is trying to say, Ms. Carter, Is that he is not very good with kids. Especially snot nosed little punks who can get you sick just by looking at you. Maybe we can get out of here and do something more constructive with our time.
Arnold Grant ~ Jefferson, That is not possible, You know that XVI has obligation to fill with the Dream Come True Foundation that every XVI Superstar has to do visits like these at last twice a month. It's a black eye on XVI if it doesn't spend a few minutes of the day to visit these children who are big fans of XVI...
Jefferson ~ Fine. Lets get on with it then.
The group then walks to the next room and enters it. On the TV Johnny Mental's interview is playing. Everyone watches the interview for a moment, Waiting for it to end, Before Amy then leans in close to Fade.
Amy ~ Here we have Billy. Billy is having liver problems and is waiting patiently for a someone to donate a liver for him. He is a huge XVI fan.
Fade ~ Hey slugger! How's it going?
Billy ~ Okay, I guess.
Jefferson ~ Listen here, Kid, Fade is here thanks to the Dream Come True Foundation. And he is here to make your last wish...
Everyone, except for Fade, glares at Jefferson. Jefferson looks at them for a second before realizing what he said and quickly covers up what he just said.
Jefferson ~ Er.. I mean... He is here to help make your dream come true. As long as it doesn't revolve around a miracle cure or something.
Amy ~ Jefferson!
Jefferson ~ What?!! Hey at least the guys on death row only get one last meal, right? Calm down. So, Uh, Slugger. What dream do you want to come true.
Billy ~ Well... I always wished that I could be part of The VNB. So, Can I wear Fade's trench coat for awhile? Just to see what it is like? I'll be real careful with it... I promise.
Fade lets out a big laugh.
Fade ~ You want to wear my coat? Haha! Oh hell no kid! This coat is staying right here!
Amy ~ What?!! Come on Fade, Just let him wear your coat for a minute.
Fade ~ I don't care if it is for 3 seconds. He is not touching my coat.
Amy ~ Come on Fade, He is just a kid. Let him wear the coat. He is sick. And he really would like to try on your coat for just a little bit.
Fade ~ Well, Then you better teach him about disappointment then, And real quick. As life is full of them. That way he can be prepared when his folks come in here and tell this punk that the doctor was just saying outside that they can't find a liver for him in time!
Billy ~ What?!!
Amy ~ Don't listen to him Billy, He doesn't know what he is talking about.
Fade ~ Sure I do. I heard the doctor telling his parents just that as soon as we came onto this floor!
Billy starts to cry as Amy quickly sits on his bed and tries to comfort him. Amy glares at Fade and Jefferson before yelling.
Amy ~ Get the hell out of here!!
Fade ~ What?!! What did I say?!!
Amy ~ Get Out!!
Arnold Grant then starts shoving Fade, And Jefferson, Out of the room before then turning and begins to apologize to both Billy and Amy Carter. The door shuts behind him as Fade and Jefferson remain in the hall. Fade then turns to Jefferson and points back into the room.
Fade ~ What the hell is their problem?
Jefferson shrugs.
Jefferson ~ Maybe it is Amy's time of the month...
Fade ~ Yea... Must be.
Together, Fade and Jefferson then begin to make their way out of the hospital. However, Suddenly, Tonya Brown, Head XVI Interviewer, Comes running up to Fade and...
Tonya ~ Fade! My God, We have been looking everywhere for you! We need to get an interview with you! Just what is going on with The VNB? We have heard all these rumors. And when we tried to go to The VNB Compound, Jihad's freakish guards wouldn't even let us near the front door! And after Jihad's interview, It sounds like The VNB is simply leaving The XVI! What is going on!
Fade ~ Yea, I saw his interview. What can you say, J can be a little dramatic at times...
Tonya ~ So what is this all about? Is The VNB leaving XVI?
However... Fade pays her question no attention, And just keeps rambling on...
Fade ~ Yea... J and I measure success in totally different ways. He measures it in... Well, I have no idea what he measures it in. But me... I measure it in cold hard cash. And of course... Ladies that have took a ride on The Fade Express! And that is why, After this weeks Side Effect... I am going to start writing a book! One called The Fade Story!
Tonya ~ But what about.... Wait... You are doing what?
Fade ~ That is right! I am going to write a tell all book on the world of wrestling! Let me tell ya baby, Mick Foley and his crappy books ain't got shit on me!
Tonya ~ My God... And just what is going to be in this book?
Fade ~ Well first off, I am going to have an entire chapter dedicated to Halo and her 79 multiple personalities. Then, Another chapter dedicated to nothing but Szaban's hair! And of course, What would a best selling book be without a kiss and tell section! So, I am going to list every single diva that ever rode The Fade Express!
Tonya ~ Um... Ok, Now, Can we get back to...
Fade ~ Lets see, There was Whisper, Ashley Hart, Rachel Martin, Ally, Stephanie, Poison, Straight-Jacket...
Tonya ~ Fade... Hang on, You do realize that 99% of the women that you say have rode this "Fade Express", Say they wouldn't touch you with a 10 foot pole right?
Fade ~ Puh-leeze! Of course they would! They all love me! I mean, There was this one time, That Halo road The Fade Express... And that night, It had a special feature... It included 11 AA batteries, A snow globe, A cucumber, A bubble bath, A razor, And 12" figurine of Elvis! Added in is ice cream, Hot chocolate, Fruit loops, Bazooka Joe’s bubble gum, And laffy taffy to add to the experience more.
Tonya ~ Dear lord...
Fade ~ But of course, It wont all be kiss and tell... I will finally, Tell the infamous story of Mak, Me, Genocide and The donkey!
Tonya... Um... What?
Fade ~ Well... I probably shouldn't tell you just yet because the book isn't out yet, But what the hell! Ya see, Many years ago, Back in The WCXF. The fed did a tour down in Mexico. Now, After the matches that night, I went out to a bar called "The Flying Burrito". Anyway... I was busy drinking just a bit when none other than Makaveli walked into the bar. Now ya see, Usually Mak and I don't get along that well. But after we both had a few drinks in us, We began to see things more eye to eye.. Anyway, As Mak and I were running up one hell of a bar tab. Who else should walk in, Well none other than Genocide! Well, Mak and I watched old Geno make his way up to a old guy in the back of the bar, He handed the guy a wad of cash, And then the old guy led him to a door in the back of the bar. Well, Of course Mak and I were curious about what the hell was going on, So we followed them. Well... After making a few wrong turns, Mak and I found this very dark room and.... WHOAAA! Lets just say, I can't tell you on live TV what we saw, But lets say it involved Geno, A donkey, Strawberry's, A ping pong ball, Feathers, Wax, A copy of Sports Illustrated Swim Suit issue, And very special kind of teddy bear that is hung from the ceiling!
Tonya cringes as she gets the mental picture in her head. Meanwhile, Fade and Jefferson have finally made their way out of the hospital... With Tonya dead on their heels....
Tonya ~ Ok... Fade, Enough is enough... Could you please tell us what all this means? What is "Plan 666"? What is all this talk of "It takes two"? Is The VNB over? What is the deal between Jihad and Halo, What the hell is going on?
Suddenly, Fade stops dead in his tracks, And his whole demeanor changes. He rubs his head for a moment as if a headache is coming on, And then turns to look at Tonya...
Fade ~ Tonya, Look... Are you just too damn stupid to understand that I don't want to talk about it? I mean shit, How many times do I have to ignore your question before you finally get that I just DON'T WANT TO TALK YOU! Yes, Something is happening within The VNB. Something, That is going to change things forever. This is a very awkward time for Jihad and myself, So if you would... Would you please back the hell up, And give us some space. I promise you, All the questions you have, Will be answered at Side Effect. Now if you will excuse me, I have many things that I need to get done before Side Effect....
And on those words, Fade and Jefferson then enter a very large limo that has been parked out front waiting on them. They quickly shut the door behind them, And the scene fades to black as the vehicle drives off into the distance...
End Scene..
Fade ~ Why the hell are we here again?
Jefferson ~ Because The XVI has made a public relations deal with the Dreams Come True Foundation and you're here to visit all these sick little disease bags. Trying to fill their heads that they are not going to die but rather they can have their last wish on earth.
Nurse Reed steps next to the door of the next room and opens it.
Sarah Reed ~ And in here is Timmy Williams. He is one of the biggest XVI fans in the hospital. It would sure brighten his day to meet you.
Fade forces a fake smile as he turns and then heads into the room.
Fade ~ Hey Timmy how are you do.... OH MY GOD!!! What the hell happened to his face!!
The camera pans to Timmy and we can see that his entire face has wicked burn scars all over it. Timmy is taken back for a second by Fade's reaction, And tears can be seen forming in his eyes, Nurse Reed quickly heads over to the boy to calm him down. Amy Carter steps in close to Fade and whispers to him.
Amy ~ Timmy fell into a fire at a family reunion where they were roasting marshmallows. As you can see he was burned very, Very, Badly.
Fade ~ It looks like someone ate his face!
Jefferson ~ Mike's right, That is one ugly kid!
Amy ~ What?!! Show a little compassion! It's not like Timmy wanted to fall into that fire. He is very sensitive about how he looks now.
Fade ~ No shit. Sure the saying is true about how chicks dig scars and all that, But not when you don't have a friggin' face. Look at him! He looks worse than Rosie O'Donnel stuffing her fat face with jelly filled donut.
Timmy starts to cry as Nurse Reed hugs him and tries to make him feel better. Amy Carter, and Arnold Grant, Then push Fade and Jefferson into the hall. Amy then glares at Fade.
Amy ~ What is wrong with you?!! How dare you insult a little boy like that?!! Is this the way every superstar in XVI acts when visiting sick children?!!
Arnold Grant ~ No, Ma'am, Not every superstar acts this way. Fade understands that sick children are very sensitive about themselves. Fade just has a problem of thinking before he speaks sometimes. Isn't that right, Fade?
Fade ~ Huh? I wasn't paying attention. Listen, Amy, Honey, Sweet cheeks. How about we forget about these kids for a few minutes and we can head over to that broom closet over there. You look like you need a ride on The Fade Express.
Amy ~ Excuse me?!! What did you just say?!!
Jefferson ~ Uh! What Fade here is trying to say, Ms. Carter, Is that he is not very good with kids. Especially snot nosed little punks who can get you sick just by looking at you. Maybe we can get out of here and do something more constructive with our time.
Arnold Grant ~ Jefferson, That is not possible, You know that XVI has obligation to fill with the Dream Come True Foundation that every XVI Superstar has to do visits like these at last twice a month. It's a black eye on XVI if it doesn't spend a few minutes of the day to visit these children who are big fans of XVI...
Jefferson ~ Fine. Lets get on with it then.
The group then walks to the next room and enters it. On the TV Johnny Mental's interview is playing. Everyone watches the interview for a moment, Waiting for it to end, Before Amy then leans in close to Fade.
Amy ~ Here we have Billy. Billy is having liver problems and is waiting patiently for a someone to donate a liver for him. He is a huge XVI fan.
Fade ~ Hey slugger! How's it going?
Billy ~ Okay, I guess.
Jefferson ~ Listen here, Kid, Fade is here thanks to the Dream Come True Foundation. And he is here to make your last wish...
Everyone, except for Fade, glares at Jefferson. Jefferson looks at them for a second before realizing what he said and quickly covers up what he just said.
Jefferson ~ Er.. I mean... He is here to help make your dream come true. As long as it doesn't revolve around a miracle cure or something.
Amy ~ Jefferson!
Jefferson ~ What?!! Hey at least the guys on death row only get one last meal, right? Calm down. So, Uh, Slugger. What dream do you want to come true.
Billy ~ Well... I always wished that I could be part of The VNB. So, Can I wear Fade's trench coat for awhile? Just to see what it is like? I'll be real careful with it... I promise.
Fade lets out a big laugh.
Fade ~ You want to wear my coat? Haha! Oh hell no kid! This coat is staying right here!
Amy ~ What?!! Come on Fade, Just let him wear your coat for a minute.
Fade ~ I don't care if it is for 3 seconds. He is not touching my coat.
Amy ~ Come on Fade, He is just a kid. Let him wear the coat. He is sick. And he really would like to try on your coat for just a little bit.
Fade ~ Well, Then you better teach him about disappointment then, And real quick. As life is full of them. That way he can be prepared when his folks come in here and tell this punk that the doctor was just saying outside that they can't find a liver for him in time!
Billy ~ What?!!
Amy ~ Don't listen to him Billy, He doesn't know what he is talking about.
Fade ~ Sure I do. I heard the doctor telling his parents just that as soon as we came onto this floor!
Billy starts to cry as Amy quickly sits on his bed and tries to comfort him. Amy glares at Fade and Jefferson before yelling.
Amy ~ Get the hell out of here!!
Fade ~ What?!! What did I say?!!
Amy ~ Get Out!!
Arnold Grant then starts shoving Fade, And Jefferson, Out of the room before then turning and begins to apologize to both Billy and Amy Carter. The door shuts behind him as Fade and Jefferson remain in the hall. Fade then turns to Jefferson and points back into the room.
Fade ~ What the hell is their problem?
Jefferson shrugs.
Jefferson ~ Maybe it is Amy's time of the month...
Fade ~ Yea... Must be.
Together, Fade and Jefferson then begin to make their way out of the hospital. However, Suddenly, Tonya Brown, Head XVI Interviewer, Comes running up to Fade and...
Tonya ~ Fade! My God, We have been looking everywhere for you! We need to get an interview with you! Just what is going on with The VNB? We have heard all these rumors. And when we tried to go to The VNB Compound, Jihad's freakish guards wouldn't even let us near the front door! And after Jihad's interview, It sounds like The VNB is simply leaving The XVI! What is going on!
Fade ~ Yea, I saw his interview. What can you say, J can be a little dramatic at times...
Tonya ~ So what is this all about? Is The VNB leaving XVI?
However... Fade pays her question no attention, And just keeps rambling on...
Fade ~ Yea... J and I measure success in totally different ways. He measures it in... Well, I have no idea what he measures it in. But me... I measure it in cold hard cash. And of course... Ladies that have took a ride on The Fade Express! And that is why, After this weeks Side Effect... I am going to start writing a book! One called The Fade Story!
Tonya ~ But what about.... Wait... You are doing what?
Fade ~ That is right! I am going to write a tell all book on the world of wrestling! Let me tell ya baby, Mick Foley and his crappy books ain't got shit on me!
Tonya ~ My God... And just what is going to be in this book?
Fade ~ Well first off, I am going to have an entire chapter dedicated to Halo and her 79 multiple personalities. Then, Another chapter dedicated to nothing but Szaban's hair! And of course, What would a best selling book be without a kiss and tell section! So, I am going to list every single diva that ever rode The Fade Express!
Tonya ~ Um... Ok, Now, Can we get back to...
Fade ~ Lets see, There was Whisper, Ashley Hart, Rachel Martin, Ally, Stephanie, Poison, Straight-Jacket...
Tonya ~ Fade... Hang on, You do realize that 99% of the women that you say have rode this "Fade Express", Say they wouldn't touch you with a 10 foot pole right?
Fade ~ Puh-leeze! Of course they would! They all love me! I mean, There was this one time, That Halo road The Fade Express... And that night, It had a special feature... It included 11 AA batteries, A snow globe, A cucumber, A bubble bath, A razor, And 12" figurine of Elvis! Added in is ice cream, Hot chocolate, Fruit loops, Bazooka Joe’s bubble gum, And laffy taffy to add to the experience more.
Tonya ~ Dear lord...
Fade ~ But of course, It wont all be kiss and tell... I will finally, Tell the infamous story of Mak, Me, Genocide and The donkey!
Tonya... Um... What?
Fade ~ Well... I probably shouldn't tell you just yet because the book isn't out yet, But what the hell! Ya see, Many years ago, Back in The WCXF. The fed did a tour down in Mexico. Now, After the matches that night, I went out to a bar called "The Flying Burrito". Anyway... I was busy drinking just a bit when none other than Makaveli walked into the bar. Now ya see, Usually Mak and I don't get along that well. But after we both had a few drinks in us, We began to see things more eye to eye.. Anyway, As Mak and I were running up one hell of a bar tab. Who else should walk in, Well none other than Genocide! Well, Mak and I watched old Geno make his way up to a old guy in the back of the bar, He handed the guy a wad of cash, And then the old guy led him to a door in the back of the bar. Well, Of course Mak and I were curious about what the hell was going on, So we followed them. Well... After making a few wrong turns, Mak and I found this very dark room and.... WHOAAA! Lets just say, I can't tell you on live TV what we saw, But lets say it involved Geno, A donkey, Strawberry's, A ping pong ball, Feathers, Wax, A copy of Sports Illustrated Swim Suit issue, And very special kind of teddy bear that is hung from the ceiling!
Tonya cringes as she gets the mental picture in her head. Meanwhile, Fade and Jefferson have finally made their way out of the hospital... With Tonya dead on their heels....
Tonya ~ Ok... Fade, Enough is enough... Could you please tell us what all this means? What is "Plan 666"? What is all this talk of "It takes two"? Is The VNB over? What is the deal between Jihad and Halo, What the hell is going on?
Suddenly, Fade stops dead in his tracks, And his whole demeanor changes. He rubs his head for a moment as if a headache is coming on, And then turns to look at Tonya...
Fade ~ Tonya, Look... Are you just too damn stupid to understand that I don't want to talk about it? I mean shit, How many times do I have to ignore your question before you finally get that I just DON'T WANT TO TALK YOU! Yes, Something is happening within The VNB. Something, That is going to change things forever. This is a very awkward time for Jihad and myself, So if you would... Would you please back the hell up, And give us some space. I promise you, All the questions you have, Will be answered at Side Effect. Now if you will excuse me, I have many things that I need to get done before Side Effect....
And on those words, Fade and Jefferson then enter a very large limo that has been parked out front waiting on them. They quickly shut the door behind them, And the scene fades to black as the vehicle drives off into the distance...
End Scene..
