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Post by "The New Era Icon" David Calaz on Jul 25, 2007 19:37:50 GMT -5
do it
went for a bit of a schitzo (sp?) theme
losing his head a little bit
tell me what you think
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Post by "The" Kobra on Jul 25, 2007 20:23:32 GMT -5
what is there too say. you're an awsome roleplayer and i enjoy reading them and this is no exception!!!
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Post by "The New Era Icon" David Calaz on Jul 26, 2007 6:42:42 GMT -5
wow thanks alot, i wasnt expexting that much... thanks for teh feedback.
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Post by Jordan "Bullet Proof" Glass on Jul 26, 2007 12:16:46 GMT -5
It was real good, but it wasn't my favorite by you. I just didn't think it flowed very well. I liked the content, the dialogue and so on and so forth .. but it just wasn't your best work. Two thumbs up.  Just my two cents.  |
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Post by ~*The Pride of Ireland*~ on Jul 26, 2007 14:22:39 GMT -5
It was a nice segment of worrying for Jaime Reed, but i think it may have been just a little bit spicier if it would have transitioned into a more obsessive "Thor doesnt realize what he has done, his twisted mind have blinded his reason, and i will show him what it means to mess with Serafin!". But otherwise i would have to say if i were in your characters position, i would have been compelled to take the same route.
As for talking about Kid Jack, you did pretty much the extent to what you could do at this point, unless the feud develops a little further. Which was good. And for the mystery person, a little mix of breaking kayfabe while still being in character was good.
Overall i think your doing a very nice job. You just need a little more Umph! In developing a more Serafin like personality, like when Jordan had in Alyssas monologue in his last roleplay.
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